Disclaimer: This blog is for reflection and education only. It does not replace therapy, is not therapy, and is not professional advice.

The Restlessness of Anxiety

Anxiety is like a dance partner we never chose, but one that often leads. It spins us in circles, whispering every possible “what if” we can imagine:

“What if I mess this up?”
“What if they don’t like me?”
“What if something bad happens?”

Anxiety isn’t proof that you’re broken. It’s your nervous system scanning for danger, trying to protect you from harm. The trouble is, anxiety often over-prepares us—making us rehearse futures that may never come true, while robbing us of the present moment.

A Familiar Scenario

Picture this: You’re preparing for a presentation at work. You’ve practiced, you know your material, and still your heart races. The night before, you toss and turn, replaying worst-case scenarios.

“What if I forget my lines?”
“What if everyone thinks I’m unqualified?”
“What if I completely fail?”

When the presentation comes, you deliver it just fine. But instead of celebrating, your brain reviews every detail, scanning for mistakes. Anxiety keeps you in hyper-alert mode, long after the moment has passed.

Why Anxiety Shows Up

At its core, anxiety is a survival instinct. It’s your body’s way of saying: “Pay attention—something might be wrong.”

The problem is, the alarm often sounds when there is no fire. Anxiety hijacks your attention, convincing you that rehearsing every possible future will keep you safe. In reality, it keeps you stuck in endless preparation mode, instead of living the actual moment.

A 3-Step Practice to Soften Anxiety

Ground in the body.
Bring your focus away from the racing mind and into the present body. Try slow breathing, stretching, or even walking. Anxiety loses intensity when we anchor in the here and now.
Name the fear in one sentence.
Instead of spiraling into “what ifs,” pause and write down the core worry: “I’m afraid I’ll embarrass myself.” Naming the fear makes it less abstract and more manageable.
Choose one small action forward.
Anxiety feeds on circling thoughts. Break the loop by taking a single step—review your notes once, make a checklist, or call a supportive friend. Small action calms the nervous system.

Closing Reflection

Anxiety doesn’t mean you’re failing –- it means your body is trying to protect you, sometimes too much. When you learn to notice it without fusing with it, anxiety becomes less of a dance partner that drags you and more of a signal you can respond to with steadiness.

You don’t have to get rid of anxiety completely. The goal is learning how to quiet its voice, so you can hear your own voice more clearly.

🌿 Reflection Questions

What’s one recent moment when anxiety pulled you into “what ifs”?
If you put your fear into one sentence, what does it sound like?
What small grounding practice helps you return to the present when anxiety rises?

Dancing with the What-Ifs: Understanding Anxiety